"Your home has more miles on it than your car."
"The taillight covers of your car are made of tape."
"You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin' dog."
"You've ever barbecued Spam on the grill."
"You can't tell what color your car is because of the dirt."
"Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup."
"You use the term `over yonder' more than once a month."
"You think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups."
"You've ever shot a deer from inside your house."
"The first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are "Howdy!", "HEY!" or"How Y'all Doin'?" (If they respond with the same... they're a redneck too!)"
"You have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior."
"You've ever spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass."
"Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand."
"Someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle"
"The directions to your house include 'turn off the paved road'."
"You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard."
"You consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food."
"You've never paid for a haircut."
"You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors."
"On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor."
"Your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown."
"You think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs."
"You take a fishing pole to Sea World."
"You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table."
"You have to hit the dashboard in your truck to get the lights and radio to work."
"Your name is Billy Joe Jim Bob III."
"You think 'Meals on Wheels' is another name for roadkill."
"You shot your own 12 point coat rack."
"You've been to the emergency room more than 3 times for mashing the wrong end of a thumb tack."
(www.ahajokes.com)
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